Category: Intentional Living

I always love to set goals and strive to achieve them. Recently, I read something profound by John Maxwell that has given me a new perspective: instead of setting goals to achieve where I wanted to be, I should set the course for who I wanted to become. I realize that I should strive intentionally for my personal growth and not just setting goals year after year. And the growth is intended to be a better person of who I can become, i.e. the best version of me. To elevate to the next level of who I wanted to become.

My life began changing when I stopped setting goals for where I wanted to be and started setting the course for who I wanted to become. I have discovered that the key to personal development is being more growth oriented than goal oriented – John Maxwell.

This made so much sense when I revised my Vision Board, as it now shows me the vision of who I want to become.  It is not just a task-oriented, goal-setting exercise anymore, it is a vision of the best version of myself that I want to elevate to! 

For example, one of my vision of myself is being Debt-Free. I am using this example as I am currently facilitating for the Compass Course ‘Navigating Your Finances God’s Way’. Therefore, it is not just the task of clearing my debts, but to gain the financial freedom of being debt-free – the who I want to become. And in becoming debt-free, I am free to serve God wholeheartedly.

Naturally, we live within the boundaries of our limits. However, there comes a time or an opportunity, that drags us out of our comfort zone and our perceived limits, to lead us into the wild unknown.

The only way to test your limits is to push beyond your limits – that’s how you will find out your limits! During this Covid situation, we are all pushed out of our comfort zone into a new norm of lockdowns, social distancing and strict hygiene. We have to accept our new norms and move forward. We have to stretch our limits in terms of how our business and cash flow have been affected, how we work and travel, even how we eat!

For those in traditional brick-and-mortar business or in the service industry, it is a great challenge to diversify and/or move online to digital eCommerce if possible. It is an opportunity to test our agility and adaptability, and to come out stronger than before.

To dream anything that you want to dream. That is the beauty of the human mind. To do anything that you want to do.That is the strength of the human will. To trust yourself to test your limits. That is the courage to succeed. – Bernard Edmonds.

All talk is worthless without any Action Plan. The best place to start is setting your Power Goals. Determine 8-10 areas of your life that you want to set powerful goals in your life, e.g. health, finances, business, family, relationships, spiritual, personal development, recreational and lifestyle. For each Power Goals, know your WHY or reason, what are the benefits you will gain, the choices you have to make, and how are you going to execute your plan. For example:

• • Power Goal – I have a healthy weight by shedding 5KG
  • Why: I want to lose weight and belly fat
  • Benefit: To have strong heart and fit body, and able to wear nice clothes
  • Choices: do intermittent fasting and daily exercise, have at least 7 hours sleep and healthy eating habits
  • Execution: to eat 2 meals a day, start the day with morning exercise, sleep before midnight, eat nutritious and variety of foods, cook at home

Doing it this way, you are recognizing your reason and benefit of doing it, and making the decisions to take action to achieve your goals.

With definite goals, you release your own power, and things start happening – Zig Ziglar.

Using Vision Board is an effective way to achieve your power goals. In this video, Jack Canfield explain how to use this powerful visualization tool to tap into your mind and make it work for you. 

You can make one for the whole year, and another one every month to keep you on track, which is what I do. For my monthly Vision Board, I put down what I want to achieve for that month, based on the Power Goals I have set for the year. Breaking down your power goals into smaller monthly goals make it more achievable and/or doable, and helps you see your progress towards your goals. Remember to celebrate your achievements every month, even if it is pat on your back, as you become a more courageous and stronger person. 

What you get from achieving your goals is not as important as by what you become by achieving your goals – Zig Ziglar

Currently, I am watching an Anime called ‘Black Clover‘. Whenever the underdog Black Bull Squad confronts their enemies, their Captain Yami would shout at them to surpass their limits!

Most of our limits are self-imposed by our beliefs system. Based on past experience and our upbringing and support system, we develop our belief system that consciously and subconsciously tells us what we can do and what we can’t do. When we recognize that our belief system is holding us back, then it is time to revamp our belief system and surpass our limits.

Eleanor Roosevelt once said: Do one thing everyday that scares you. Isn’t that a great challenge to overcome your fear and limiting beliefs?

A warrior doesn’t repeat himself. Surpass your limits. This is the path to you realizing your dreams – Yami Sukehiro (Black Clover).

What is your game plan in life? Do you play not to lose, or do you play to win? Many people, who have reached a certain level of success in their lives, default to living life with the game plan of play not to lose. As long as I am not losing, I am fine; why rock the boat? Similar to the mentality – if it ain’t broken, don’t fix it!

Playing to win is a different mentality, whereby you are determine to seize any opportunities to win. You take on the challenges, you take on the risks, because you want to win!

If you have been drifting through most of your life, it’s most likely you are playing not to lose. However, if you want to succeed in life, or go to the next level in your life, it is time to change to a new game plan of Play To Win! Or at lest, be in the winning team, or with people who wants you to win in life.

Find the game where you can win, and commit your life to playing it; and play to win.

Robert Kiyosaki

Most of us have traits from our parents, some even from grandparents or uncles or aunties. Nevertheless, we are totally unique, even with twins. We want to constantly fit into society or groups of people, thinking that it will help us belong there. The problem is when we lose our identify or our values trying to fit in.

The beauty of our uniqueness has become cliche and lost its meaning. We are meant to be born in this time, in our family, in our country. There is no mistake, no accidents. Each person in our family help each family member to be who they are. They make us who we are. The people who support, encourage, love and inspire us; as well as the ones who annoy, irritate, scold, humiliate, shame, and even abuse us; they make us who we are today. Like it or not, your past experiences, and the people in your past – they uniquely make you who you are today.

In the concept of Kintsugi in Japan, broken objects are often repaired with gold. The flaw is seen as a unique piece of the object’s history, which adds to its beauty. The transformation from brokenness to beauty, is made possible when we recognize our past hurts and experiences – turn them into powerful life’s lessons – to strengthen us and make us compassionate beings. Then we become unique masterpieces of ourselves.

Who are you? Such a simple question, but I bet many people would find it quite a challenge to answer this question succinctly. Do you identify yourself with your name, job/business, your roles, your strength and weakness, your personality, etc?

I believe we are all Children of God, or the universe if you prefer. We are created to serve our purposes with our lives. Many people have found their purposes in their calling or ministries, businesses or projects, many more have found in their families, raising their children for the next generation. We are always being prepared for the next phase as we progress in life, though they are some who are stuck in the same phase as they refuse to learn the lesson to proceed to the next phase, or they are too comfortable where they are.

Then they are the chosen few – who seek out and establish the boldest version of themselves – just to fulfil their true purpose, in humility and in gratitude. As we weather through the global storm of the Covid pandemic, let us take this time to search deep within us for the answers waiting in our hearts for the question: Who Are You? Then Dare to be YOU.

As we “rebuild” who we are, one of the tasks most needed is to set your house in order. Just like we do spring-cleaning for our house, we also need to do spring-cleaning for our hearts as well. For me, that means Love and Forgiveness. 

Unforgiveness is the prison you lock the person who has hurt you with your justification and pain, not realizing the person you have imprisoned is actually – yourself! You shake angrily at the prison bars of the person who has hurt you, not knowing if the other person is even aware of the pain he/she had caused you. The bad news is that when you look around, you find that the prison bars are actually around you!

The good news is that you hold the key to unlock this prison of unforgiveness. If you find it so hard to forgive, remember how Jesus had forgiven Peter, and all those who had persecuted and killed Him. If you can’t relate to that, imagine yourself rotting in this prison while the other person is free (and maybe happily oblivious?). Do you still want to imprison yourself and deny your own freedom and blessings? For how can you receive any blessings when you have locked yourself in this prison of unforgiveness?

Other than forgiving others, more importantly, love yourself by forgiving yourself. Forgive yourself for past failures, disappointments and regrets. Move forward with love and kindness in your heart.

One of the turning point in my life is when I started to change my mindset of scarcity to Abundance. I used to worry a lot, especially about money, and I ended up strapped in credit cards debt for a few years, partly due to overspending on my house renovation. The stress took a heavy toll on my mental health, and finally I was determined to change my mindset, and to trust God to get me out of my credit card debt. He not only got me out of my credit card debt, but showed me what an Abundant God He is!

Related to this Abundance mindset, is the Attitude of Gratitude – being grateful for the things I have and stop complaining about the things I don’t have. Lo and behold, I found that I have so much more to be grateful for!

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves: who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are we not to be?

Marianne Williamson

Scientist have established that we are only using a small percentage of estimated 5% of our mind, and we have 95% of our subconscious mind controlling our underlying thoughts and behaviours. Not many people realize our subconscious mind is very powerful and subtle, and they mostly form our Limiting Beliefs that many times sabotage our successes.

You need to ‘Climb Your Mountains’ of Limiting Beliefs in your  life that is holding you back, for examples:

• • Money is evil / Money will bring unhappiness or stress
  • No one will love the “real me”
  • I will be rejected or betrayed if I fall in love again
  • I can’t trust anyone / I can’t be trusted anymore
  • I am too old / young or not good enough
  • I don’t have enough time / experience / skill
  • I am comfortable enough / I don’t want to rock the boat
  • Why pursue a dream that is destined to fail?
• E.g. If you want to be rich, but on the other hand, have a limiting belief about the evil of money and you scorn on filthy rich people – this limiting belief will end up sabotaging your struggling efforts to become rich.

• There are no limits on what you can achieve in your life, except for the limits you accept in your own mind. – Brian Tracy

I saw this really cute video by a little girl, who decided to put on her mother’s lipstick. The father took the video and asked her who gave her permission to use the “yipick”, and she said, ‘I ask myself!‘

What a powerful statement: to give myself permission, especially coming from such a little girl! How sad that as we grow up, we forget to give ourselves permission – to laugh at ourselves, to cry in sadness, to try and fail, to love unconditionally without the fear of getting hurt, to be patient and kind to ourselves, to have big and bold dreams, to do things that matter to us! So go ahead, give yourself permission to do big and bold things that matters to you this year! Give yourself permission to fail, as long as you do something that you have always wanted to do but was too afraid. Give yourself permission to feel the emotions inside of you – be it love or hate, joy or sorrow, excitement or anxiety, hope or disappointment, empathy or shame – as your emotions are part of who you are.