Regret Is Something You Choose to Carry with You

Is there a regret you carry with you for the longest time?

Did you keep it a secret out of shame and embarrassment?

Did you finally overcome it?

Mel Robbins shared in her latest podcast, “How to Learn From Your Mistakes: Let Go of Regret & Move Forward”, how she regretted getting her breast implants and kept quiet about it for three long years, suffering from the shame of regret and keeping quiet about it out of sheer embarrassment. She had the symptoms of brain fog, numbness and tingling sensations, but didn’t realize that it was from the implants. After she found out, she did extensive research and talked to many people, and had them surgically removed. She was finally free from the physical illness symptoms and the shame of her biggest regret. She chose not to carry her regret any longer.

Now, she shares it on her podcast, hoping to let her listeners know that we all make mistakes, and that we can overcome our regrets. My three biggest takeaways are:

  • Sharing my regret/burden can help me feel less alone
  • Seeking help from trusted friends or family can empower me to take action to overcome or resolve the situation or circumstances
  • Choosing to learn from my lesson to come out stronger and wiser

It takes great humility and courage to choose to stop carrying my regret. It was the Redeeming Love of Jesus that empowered me to forgive myself and to let go of the shame. God’s love is so great that there is no regret that He cannot redeem you from.

I know that – I AM REDEEMED BY GOD.

Today, I invite you to seek God’s Redeeming Love to overcome your regrets, instead of letting it haunt you. Whether you are consciously or unconsciously choosing to carry your regrets, you have the power of God’s Love to REDEEM you. If you have lived a blessed life of no regrets, then share this message with someone who might need it and let God’s Love redeem them.

Being Grateful with the Bronze Medal Mentality

Last week, I was listening to Mel Robbins’ podcast on the Olympics. One of the topic she touched on was the Bronze Medal Mentality. Based on studies, the bronze medalists were actually happier than the silver medalists. The reason is that the silver medalist would compare with the gold medalist – filled with regrets of all the what-ifs, as he/she had fallen short of obtaining the gold medal. This is especially acute if the difference between the gold and silver medal was by a few seconds or milliseconds!

The bronze medalist, on the other hand, is just thrilled to be on the podium, receiving a medal. Sometimes, this is a chance in a lifetime, for example, at the Olympic Games. Bringing back a medal for your country is such an honour. Standing there on the podium – that is truly a privilege, compared to those who did not make it to the podium.

The problem with most silver medalist is the comparison upwards with the gold medalist, and the subsequent regrets. That happens to most people – we compare our jobs or business, our cars or houses – and find that we fall short of other people who are better off than us, resulting in envy and jealousy. This is true even when we have so much in our lives already. This is most rampant in social media, where people show the highlights of their lives, e.g. their overseas vacation or grand birthday celebration, and we feel we are missing out on these things that we think we should have.

This Bronze Medal Mentality highlights the gratefulness I should have for the many blessings in my life, rather than comparing what others have that I don’t have. What I have IS more than enough. A medal signifies my achievement – how far I’ve come and how hard I’ve worked to get to where I am today. A bronze medal motivates me to reach for a higher level of achievement. There is more room for improvement and advancement. Always be grateful with what I have achieved and aim higher and bigger next time! I am reminding myself to celebrate all the small wins, yes, the bronze medals, and the major wins will come when I receive my gold medals in life!

Overcome Imposter Syndrome

I was listening to Mel Robbins interview with her daughter, Kendall, on the topic of imposter syndrome. Kendall is an upcoming singer/writer who attended her first music festival during a weekend and felt like an imposter at the backstage where she had an artist pass.

I can relate with her. When I first launched my journal on Nehemiah in 52 days on 6th November 2022, I hardly believe I could call myself an “journal author”. Then one year later in 2023, I published my journals in Amazon, and I still feel a little embarrassed to call myself an “international author”.

I realise that I am putting myself down. There is no doubt that it is an achievement to write two journals, publish and print them in Malaysia, and then publish them in Amazon Kindle in both digital and paperback versions.

Kendall mentioned the phrase – beat everyone to your inconvenient truth – be honest and vulnerable about her situation as a beginner in the music industry. So, the truth is that I only sold a handful of books. And my blog has only a handful of subscribers. In fact, I was very close to quitting this blog last year as I was writing so inconsistently and lacking motivation. This year, I have decided to write and post every Monday (yes, I am sweating now).

Kendall mentioned having the beginner mindset to overcome imposter syndrome. We are all here to learn and to share, that we can all learn from each other. She also flipped the switch and decided to be grateful to be where she was and to enjoy herself at this great opportunity to meet so many of her music idols at the music festival.

I am truly grateful for the opportunity to publish my own journals, and to write in my own blog. I am proud of what I have achieved. In fact, all of us should recognize and be very proud of our many achievements.

Question: What are the achievements you should be proud of and thank yourself for?

5-Second Brain Hack Rule

Perhaps you have heard of the 3-second rule where you drop you food and you can still pick it up and eat it if it is within 3 seconds. Recently, I heard of the most interesting 5-Second Rule by Mel Robbins. It is a brain hack where you count down 5-4-3-2-1 to interrupt your habit loops and prompts you into action. Instead of hitting the alarm clock snooze button, you count down 5-4-3-2-1 and get out of bed! 

Basically, it is a fact that we are never going to feel like doing the things we should do (e.g. exercise), hence we need to stop waiting to feel like doing it. We need to determine what we want, and practically force ourselves to do it. Just like how our parents used to force us to our homework and do house chores, now we need to “parent”, or force, ourselves to do it. 

When you want to do something or have an interesting idea, act upon it within 5 seconds, before your brain hijacks you and talks you out of it. When you see someone interesting and want to talk to him/her, go over and say ‘Hi!’. If you think longer about it, you will most likely “chicken out”. When you think of exercising, quickly put on your proper gear and walk out, before you change your mind. When the alarm clock rings in the morning, count down 5-4-3-2-1 and get out of bed. Overcome your inertia or procrastination by this simple 5-second rule! Your daily battles come down to this 5-second decisions you make every day! You need to determine what you want, then do what you need to do to get what you want! Try this 5-Second Rule!!!

The time is now. Stop hitting the snooze button on your life.
– Mel Robbins –