Tag: #accountabilitypartner

The Success Habit of Keeping Your Promises

Do you say one thing but do another?

Do you find excuses not to do what you said you would?

Do you still keep on making the same promises and breaking them?

I was watching an Instagram reel and this guy was saying that this is THE ONE habit that you must keep if you want to succeed in your life – do what said you would do. So simple, yet so profound! It hit me hard as I have developed the bad habit of putting off the things I said I would do, and often breaking the promises I have made to myself.

I realize that it doesn’t matter what productivity hack I have discover, or new insights I have gained, or new skills/talents I have developed – if I don’t keep the promises I made to myself and to do the things I said I would do. For example, every night, I say I want to sleep early. Guess what – I always end up losing track of my time scrolling through social media, and sleeping way later than I should!

This is what I figure I must do:

  1. Write it Down – put pen to paper, or type it on your gadget – and more importantly, write down why it is important to do it
  2. Prepare an Action Plan – determine what are the tasks involved, how long it is estimated to take or deadlines, and sometimes, the people involved
  3. Get an Accountability Partner – to keep you accountable for your actions – for me, this works like magic!
  4. Celebrate all the small wins – each celebration triggers the brain to want to do more of it – it is a dopamine reward to keep up your momentum

I know that when I keep the promises I made to myself, my trustworthiness and self-esteem increases. I feel more confident to take up more challenges in the future, because I can trust myself to do the things I said I would do.

This is my invitation to you: start keeping small promises to yourself and celebrate each small win. Build on this habit and keep on levelling up.

Always Seek to be Better Than Before

I am currently reading Gretchen Rubin’s book called ‘Better Than Before – Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives’. In the book, she started with knowing yourself by your tendency, which she identified below:

1. UPHOLDERS respond readily to both outer and inner expectations
2. QUESTIONERS question all expectations, and will meet an expectation only if they believe it's justified
3. OBLIGERS respond readily to outer expectations but struggle to meet inner expectations
4. REBELS resist all expectations, outer and inner

Wow! I realize I am an Obliger – I am habitually doing things for people and what I believe they expect from me, and more. But I lack the same conviction to keep the promises I made to myself.

Obligers often dislike their tendency. They’re vexed by the fact that they can meet others’ expectations, but not their expectations for themselves

I was screaming in my head, YES! This is so true! I am totally frustrated when I fail to meet my own expectations.

The happiest and most successful people are those who have figured out ways to exploit their tendency to their benefit and just as important, found ways to counterbalance its limitations

This is what I have learnt and my actions taken so far:

  • I need external expectation to push me – that’s why I had publicly announced in my blog that I would post every Monday – and this has worked well starting this year 2024
  • I need an accountability partner – and I found one who keeps me accountable for my weekly blog posts and even give me great feedback on my posts
  • I need to do scheduling – I have setup an paid app called NotePlan and I am starting to do time blocking for my projects and daily tasks
  • I need to abstain from social media on my phone – after many failed attempts to curb my social media scrolling, I finally deleted both Facebook and Instagram apps on my phone last week (I can still access them through their websites but not so convenient)

Finding out my Obliger tendency has opened my eyes to understand why I fail badly without external expectations and how I can overcome it. I am glad that I am working toward becoming ‘Better Than Before’. Do check out the book and find out which tendency you are!

Journal Author in 52 days!

Interview with Malar
Interview with Malar

I had an interview with my friend, Malar, on my journey as an author. It started when I decided to take up 3 coaching sessions with Ze Ann with the objective of starting my side hustle. I was determined to complete and launch my journal book on Nehemiah in 52 days, which was how many days Nehemiah took to rebuild the broken walls of Jerusalem. Hence my Blessed Journal was launched on 6th November 2022.

What really made a difference this time – as I had been wanting to do this for three years – was having my coach be my accountability partner. I was committed to take daily action towards my goal and update my coach on a daily basis, which created a momentum.

I am still wrapping my head around my new identity as a Journal Author. I am glad that God has paved the way for me to this new life adventure.

I pray that each one of us dig out our long lost dream and pursue it with determination. God gives us dream to pursue, and in our pursuit, we will feel alive and confident.

Dare to Dream.

Dream Big.

Be Bold and Audacious.

Pursue Your Dream Relentless.

As we come to the end of the year, let us seek our God-inspired dream to pursue for the coming new year. Best to share your dream out as soon as you can, so that you don’t get a chance to back away from it!

Please check out my Blessed Journal-

Online store https://blessedjournal2022.com

Facebook https://www.Facebook.com/blessedjournal2022

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/blessedjournal2022

12 Week Year

Many years ago, there was an American movie called, ‘Honey, I shrunk the kids’. That’s what I feel like when I first read the book, The Twelve Week Year, by Brian P Moran and Michael Lennington. They challenged the Annual 12 months planning, to shrink it to 12 weeks.
The starting point is the vision, the emotional connection, the purpose of it. So why 12 weeks? It is more predictable, more focused, and has a better structure and more importantly, better execution.
The important lessons I have learnt from the book are:
– It is not a knowledge problem, it’s an execution problem
– The emotional connection with my vision, my compelling reason
– Doing things consistently – on a daily and weekly basis
– Measuring effectively – measuring both the execution and the results. We tend to measure just the results and get discouraged. By measuring execution, we can determine if our execution is providing the results we want. This was what really struck me – measuring execution.
– Accountability is not consequences, but taking ownership of our choices

After using this 12 Week Year for 12 weeks, I found that the idea is good, but my implementation was flawed. Without an accountability partner for the Weekly Accountability Meeting, I was not measuring effectively. Measurement drives the process and without it, I was not achieving my results.

I also realize that I needed to take control of my time – to spend time intentionally, to be mindful of how I spend my time. My biggest time-waster is social media, where I can scroll through them for hours. It is also my biggest distraction to be checking my WhatsApp – even while typing this sentence!!!

Bottomline: this is a very good book and awesome concept. I need to implement it in a way that works for me, and I need an accountability partner.

Side Mirror

Recently, I lost my car’s side mirror at the passenger side. I felt so handicapped without it, as I felt so unsure when changing lane or parking or reversing as I can’t see my blind spot! It made me think of living life with blind spot and wondering what is my blind spot.

I figure that one of the blind spot I have is my limiting beliefs. Past bad experiences has shaped what I believe I can, and cannot do. Fear of Failure has kept me away trying new things. Fear of Winning has kept me within my comfort zone, as winning might mean more responsibility and new challenges.

My analogy of having a side mirror in life is to have friends, in particular, Accountability Partners, who can see your blind spots and hold you accountable for your actions. If you set any goals, be it health, business or any goals, your accountability partners can help you see through your excuses and justifications, guide you in your journey, get you back on track when you have sidetracked, and make you accountable. They should “mirror” who you are and show you your blind spots as you drive along your journey towards your goals. It certainly has a significant impact on my life having accountability partners!