Embrace and celebrate our imperfect self to become our masterpiece

In our current world, we strive for perfection. And it is getting easier than ever to achieve the perfect image – through filters and AI. In our social media, we show our best photos. In our social settings, we display our best appearances. Behind all these virtual and physical masks, we hide our imperfections. Surely, I am guilty of it!

I like the Japanese art called Kintsugi – the art of repairing broken objects, often ceramic pottery or glass, with gold lacquer. For me, what is so amazing is that the repaired pottery is even more beautiful that the original, as the golden lacquer brings out the beauty of the broken pieces. It is not ruined, as the broken pieces have been weaved into a new masterpiece.

That is also true of us – when we take our broken pieces and weave lovingkindness for healing, to become a new person – using the lessons we have learnt from our failures – to make us stronger and more compassionate. Our failures teach and guide us, reveal insights about ourselves and sometimes, force us to face the painful truths within us. We become healed from our brokenness and become “real” – to experiencing LIFE with its joy and sorrow, laughter and tears, achievement and frustration, freedom and oppression. The depth of sorrow brings new height to our joy. The long agony of frustration makes us value our hard-earned achievements and successes. Our failures make us who we are today. We celebrate our imperfections as they made us into our own masterpiece.

We don’t need to hide our imperfections, especially not from ourselves. To recognise the beauty of our imperfection – is how we can see our self-worth – to be confident of who we are and appreciate how far we have come in our journey of life.

No masks. No filters. No AI.

Just as we are.

Absolutely Beautiful.

Perfectly Imperfect.

Just as how God made us.

Using Scaffolding to Build Your Dreams

I read Adam Grant’s book, Hidden Potential, which introduced the concept of scaffolding. We stop dreaming when we don’t see a way to achieve our dream. That’s why the author came up with the concept of scaffolding as a temporary structure to support the building of our dream.

When people can’t see a path, they stop dreaming of the destination. To ignite their will, we need to show them the way. That’s what scaffolding can do.

In Part 1 of his book, he explained the difference between personality and character:

• Personality is your predisposition – your basic instincts for how to think, feel and act. Character is your capacity to prioritize your values over your instincts

• Personality is not your destiny – it’s your tendency. Character skills enable you to transcend that tendency to be true to your principles.

It is the skills of character that is the basis of the scaffolding. The last century had seen the shift from developing character to improving personality traits. However, we should return to building and strengthening our character, and to have a growth mindset. The author talked about accelerating growth by “embracing, seek and amplifying discomfort” – which he did by making more mistakes. I believe that we have an unhealthy concept of mistakes – viewing them as failure and to be avoided by all cost. Our society has a high acceptance of success, without realizing that the journey of success is paved with many mistakes and failures – stories that are not often shared. The truth is that mistakes are often valuable lessons to be learnt to help us reflect and grow.

Building a dream is not easy – but it is worth it. Never lose hope for your dreams – use whatever scaffolding to support you as you embrace discomfort in the pursuit of your dreams.

Embrace and Celebrate Your True Self

In the recent Emmy’s acceptance speech by Niecy Nash on 16th January 2024, she thanked herself, with a loud applause from the audience. Yes, we all recognize how important it is to thank ourselves.

I love her choice of words to believe in herself – a delicious invitation to believe in yourself. She won the awards against all odds. She gave voice to all women who went through tremendous hardships and inspired all women to not lose hope. She celebrated who she is and what she has achieved by believing in herself. What a wonderful speech!

We so often do so much, non-stop, one task after another. No one knows the frustration we feel and/or the tears we cried, or the numerous times we wanted to quit. No one knows how much it costs us to keep believing in ourselves when no one else did. Yet, with all the major and minor achievements, we let the celebration slip. When we fail, we beat ourselves. But when we succeed, do we remember to take time to celebrate? Are we not worthy of celebration? Hence, we must remember to celebrate when we achieve something, whether big or small – a simple pat on your back, or a high-5 to yourself in the mirror, or a celebration cake or chocolate or meal or drink. Remember: We are worthy of celebration.

I know of friends who downplay birthday celebrations, especially as they get older. I believe we should always celebrate:

  • Celebrations are a reminder of who we are and what we’ve achieved, not just another number or another year.
  • Celebrations bring meaning to our achievements and milestones
  • Celebrations bring us together with people who love and support us
  • Celebrations bring joy and treasured memories
  • Celebrations inspire us to dream bigger!

Today, I embrace and celebrate my true self. And I celebrate and thank God for creating the one-and-only ME! Yes, I just looked at the mirror and told myself – You Are Awesome – and gave myself an High-5!

Question: How can you embrace and celebrate your true self today?

Magic Happens Outside of your Comfort Zone

Continuing with last week’s post on Roxie Nafousi’s book, Manifest, her third step is Align Your Behaviour – to show the universe what you believe you deserve. And that means taking proactive actions to align with your most authentic self.

Every single time you step outside of your comfort zone, you attract abundance to you. This is because magic happens outside of your comfort zone – Roxie Nafousi.

We have a tendency to stay stuck in our comfort zone, as we fear failure when we step out of our comfort zone. It takes courage to venture into the unknown and explore new adventures. I believe we learn more from our failures than our successes. Each failure is a lesson learnt. We grow through our failures. Our society frown upon failures, encouraging us seek safety and comfort instead. However, it is only in our leap of faith into the vast landscape of opportunities do we feel truly alive and excited in doing what we have dreamt of. The magic is in living our dreams!

One of the ways of aligning your behaviour is creating daily healthy habits. John Maxwell believed that: you will never change your life until you change something you do daily. The secret of success is found in your daily routine.

Some suggested routines are:

  • Morning Routine to start the day – meditation, exercise, affirmation, visualisation, journaling, planning for the day
  • Evening Routine to end the day – review of the day, planning the next day, gratitude journaling, spending time with spouse and/or children
  • Daily Routine – drink water, eat nutritious (non-processed) food, sleep early, have movement/steps, pause and close eyes, take a few deep breaths, pray, read, do something different every day (e.g. change your route to/from work).

I believe in magic, or miracles, in our lives. When we open our eyes to seek the magic and wonders in our lives, we will recognise them. Magic happens when we dare to pursue big bold dreams.

Question: What is the Magic you are seeking in your life?

Manifest the person you want to be

Last year, I read the book ‘Manifest’ by Roxie Nafousi. Her first step is – Be clear in your vision. Instead of focusing on manifesting things, we should focus on manifesting the person we want to be. For me, this mean the journey of becoming the best version of the person I want to be.

When visualizing your ideal future, visualize not just what you want to manifest, but the person that you want to be – Roxie Nafousi

In her book, her second step was to remove fear and doubt that blocks manifestation – to do the inner work of healing. We have to master our thoughts, be aware of what we say to ourselves and the language we use, to use positive affirmations and to practice visualisation.

She believed self-love is the driving force behind manifesting. I always thought of self-love as doing things to care for myself, e.g. going for massage, reading a book over a nice cup of tea, listening and dancing to music when no one is watching. I realise that it is more than doing things to make me feel good – it is a way to honour who I am and who I want to become. And it goes way deeper – it is empowering.

Self-love empowers you to step into your light, to step into your greatness and to open up space for abundance to enter your life – Roxie Nafousi

Self-love also means forgiving myself and putting my past behind. To take my past mistakes as lessons that I needed to learn. To be kind to myself – to recognise my achievements and appreciate how far I’ve come in my life. And to be confident that I can dream big and achieve greater heights by manifesting the highest version of my Future Self.

Manifest Exercise – describe the person you want to be.

Overcome Imposter Syndrome

I was listening to Mel Robbins interview with her daughter, Kendall, on the topic of imposter syndrome. Kendall is an upcoming singer/writer who attended her first music festival during a weekend and felt like an imposter at the backstage where she had an artist pass.

I can relate with her. When I first launched my journal on Nehemiah in 52 days on 6th November 2022, I hardly believe I could call myself an “journal author”. Then one year later in 2023, I published my journals in Amazon, and I still feel a little embarrassed to call myself an “international author”.

I realise that I am putting myself down. There is no doubt that it is an achievement to write two journals, publish and print them in Malaysia, and then publish them in Amazon Kindle in both digital and paperback versions.

Kendall mentioned the phrase – beat everyone to your inconvenient truth – be honest and vulnerable about her situation as a beginner in the music industry. So, the truth is that I only sold a handful of books. And my blog has only a handful of subscribers. In fact, I was very close to quitting this blog last year as I was writing so inconsistently and lacking motivation. This year, I have decided to write and post every Monday (yes, I am sweating now).

Kendall mentioned having the beginner mindset to overcome imposter syndrome. We are all here to learn and to share, that we can all learn from each other. She also flipped the switch and decided to be grateful to be where she was and to enjoy herself at this great opportunity to meet so many of her music idols at the music festival.

I am truly grateful for the opportunity to publish my own journals, and to write in my own blog. I am proud of what I have achieved. In fact, all of us should recognize and be very proud of our many achievements.

Question: What are the achievements you should be proud of and thank yourself for?

Being Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable

You think that most people want to be happy, right? I suspect the truth is closer to the fact that most people want to be comfortable. Then naturally, they would be comfortably happy!

But to grow, we need to get out of our comfort zone, and do the uncomfortable things that challenges us. For example, I was uncomfortable taking photos of myself and posting them on social media. As a photographer, I felt more comfortable behind the lens than in front of it. It took me awhile to be comfortable in taking selfies on my iPhone. I found out that using DSLR camera to shoot is quite different from using the iPhone camera to shoot selfies. It’s quite a different skill set! Now, I am quite comfortable and confident taking selfies, as long as there is good lighting!

My next challenge is taking videos, which I am still very uncomfortable. I am even finding ways to post videos on social media without showing my face..! Haha!

Nevertheless, I really want to overcome it and do this uncomfortable thing. I have a new project which requires my social media presence more “vividly” (showing my face lah). I have been hiding comfortably behind written words in this personal blog of mine. It is time for me to move to the next level. It is time for my exponential growth – my 10X growth – for 2024.

What is the uncomfortable thing you know you should do to accelerate your personal growth this year?

How can 10X Be Easier than 2X?

10X is Easier than 2X - based on the book of the same name.
10X is Easier than 2X – based on the book of the same name.

The proposition that 10X is easier than 2X was so counterintuitive that I was immediately intrigued by what the speaker, Dr Benjamin Hardy, was saying in his Instagram channel. In his book with Dan Sullivan called “10X is Easier than 2X”, Dr Benjamin Hardy explained that – 2X is a linear process of increasing your quantity whereas 10X is a non-linear fundamental QUALITATIVE change in your Vision and Identity. It’s not about more, it’s about LESS. It’s a simplification and filtering system – that strips away 80% of your current life that is not serving your 10X goals and focusing on the 20% that is relevant and making an impact towards what you want to achieve. It is a process – a process of becoming a new person.

10X is the means, and FREEDOM is the end – the freedom of Time, Money, Relationship and Purpose.

2X is doubling what you are doing now, but you can’t 10X what you’re doing now. You essentially have to change who you are and how you’ve been doing things. Benjamin Hardy’s journey came at the moment of full commitment – the Point of No Return – where he shifted his identity and energy from avoiding what he feared to fully approaching what he wanted most. He said,

“Make your goal impossible then ask yourself how you can create these “unless” conditions to make the impossible, possible.”

He said that 10X goals are easier and less competitive, as we are out of the majority market of people pursuing 2X goals. We got to be thinking out-of-the-box, be creative and innovative, and be hyper-focus. We are not required to be 10X better as 10%-20% better or difference can produce 10X bigger results. And that’s the beauty of this concept! I absolutely love this visionary idea!!!

Turning into a Pillar of Salt for Looking Back

Today, I was going through the YouVersion plan by Christine Caine called ‘Don’t Look Back’. The main story was Lot’s wife, who was told not to look back as the angel helped Lot and his wife to escape Sodom. She was told to do one thing – not look back – and she did exactly the one thing she was told not to do, and was turned into a pillar of salt.

I believe, we all have our “Sodom” that we look back to:

  • the who we used to be
  • the what we used to have
  • the place we used to live in
  • the “normal” we had before the Covid pandemic
  • the unforgiveness that robs our peace
  • the dashed hopes or dreams or expectations
  • the past seasons of our lives that was much easier
  • the youth and/or health we took for granted
  • the secret thoughts that darken our mind
  • the shame that we hide behind our facade

Even though God had told us to let them go and DON’T LOOK BACK.

This question in the YouVersion plan struck me:

Are you lingering in a place and longing for what was, all the while tolerating what is, all in hopes that if you linger long enough, you might get back what God told you to leave?

Are we so foolish to think that if we linger long enough, we might get back what we long for? In Luke 17:32, Remember Lot’s Wife – Jesus reminds us not to turn back – or face the consequences. God is commanding is to MOVE ON.

As we start a new year, let go of whatever that is no longer serving us or even holding us back, and move forward boldly to a new adventure.

Are you connecting to your core values?

Connect to Core Values
Connect to Core Values

In the book Bittersweet by Susan Cain, she talked about accepting the bitter and losses in our lives, and how it can lead us to connect to our values and subsequently acting on those values.

I reflected upon it and listed the core values I believe is important to me at this season of my life:

  1. Courage – courage to do what God has called me to do, to trust in God’s plan for my life, and to be led by the power of the Holy Spirit
  2. Compassion – to reach out to others and inspire them to dream boldly, and more importantly, to have compassion on myself – to be kind and gentle to the little girl in me
  3. Creativity – to use my talents in bold unique ways to give glory to God – dare to dream big, be bold, go wild, run free, dance like no one is watching, and have lots of fun!
  4. Gratitude – to give thanks for the countless blessings in my life, including the trials that strengthen my character and driven me to be who I am today

I realise that I need to align my values with what I am doing in my life. That whatever project or work I embark on, it needs to align with my core values. And these values must be outward seeking, that is, it is to serve others and to give glory to God.

As we start the new year of 2024, I invite you to connect to your values and seek to live in alignment with your core values.

May this year 2024 be a wonderful year for you!

Bittersweet Year of 2023

I was totally struck by the interview between Mindvalley’s Vishen Lakhiani and author Susan Cain. She has a new book called, “Bittersweet – How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole”. I was so intrigue that I quickly got this book and read it. Her previous book, “Quiet – The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking” is the de-facto book for introverts.

Her book helped me to accept pain and sorrow in my life. It is healthy to recognise the emotions of pain and sorrow as part of life – that there is no escape. Her book gave me so much hope in that it encourages me to acknowledge and accept the bitterness of life, and transforming it into creativity, transcendence and love. It is after experiencing bitterness that we treasure the sweetness of joy even more. And it had given me inspiration to transform my biggest trials this year into exploration, discovery, adventure and renewed confidence. Basically, it was God’s way of pushing me out of my comfort zone into the next level of who I can become.

In her book, Susan Cain wrote the real reason for our emotions is to connect us. And Sadness, of all the emotions, was the ultimate bonding agent. We can see this in the movie, “Inside Out”. We can see it in funerals, death and grieving.

Sadness triggers compassion. It brings people together.

It is humbling to go through sadness and sorrow. But when we go through these emotions, they can bring us closer to other people through our compassion, if we allow them. It helps us sieve through our overwhelming noise and distraction, and connect us to what matters most. And this can lead us to take committed action to transform the bitter to the sweet. Let the bitter lessons of life bring renewed hope and joy, gratitude and compassion, to people around us.

My Confident Hope in Jesus Never Fails

Nothing prepared me for the challenges I faced this year. I was sent into the wilderness and went through the refining fire. I thank God that He rescued me from the financial hole I dug myself into, and saved me. He showed His loving faithfulness in so many big and small ways during this challenging time.

It has been a year of inner healing working through my inner child trauma. I realised that I had acted so foolishly out of my fear and insecurity. I have emerged stronger and more confident, knowing that God always has my back – that He carries me through my storms and sits with me through my tears. Nothing is greater than God’s love for us. I have experienced it in so many ways this year.

As the year 2023 come to an end, I am truly grateful for the year that has seen me grow in hope in Jesus. I learnt that my confident hope is in the person of Jesus and my dire circumstances will never change it. He also showed the beauty within me and when I look at myself in the mirror.

One of the physical manifestation of my confidence is wearing my hatsI I don’t care what people think because I love wearing hats and I look good in them. So I am just gonna don my hat and adorn my countenance with a smile! God has great plan for each of us. I am reminded this year that, even when I mess up, God is always around to help me pick up the pieces and make things new and better.

My Confident Hope in Jesus never fails.

How to Nourish a Starved Soul

We nourish our bodies with nutritious food.
So I pondered: how do I nourish my starved soul?

Let me share my ways:
– Gratitude: give thanks for the many blessings in my life
– Kindness: being kind to myself, and not beat myself up when I fail
– Gentleness: be gentle and go easy on myself on hard days
– Forgiveness: forgive myself
– Experience pain and sorrow: to allow the emotions to overwhelm me in a safe space, and not bury them all the time; to cry, scream or shout or any other ways to let my emotions flow out safely
– Reading: to gain insight, learnings, and to enter into the world of the author
– Travel: to explore new places, food, cultures and environment
– Support: to seek support from family and friends who understands me, instead of carrying the burden by myself
– Authenticity: to have the courage to be vulnerable and to reveal my true self, good and bad
– Beauty: to recognize the beauty within my soul and treasure it
– Service: to reach out to serve others in need, to service in a community
– To Love: to love others unconditionally, no strings attached
– To Be Loved: to allow others to love me unconditionally, to allow them to enter into my inner world
– To know that – It’s okay not to be okay sometimes, that I haven’t gotten it all together in some seasons of my life, but it’s okay
– To Wait: to know that I sometimes need to wait for God’s timing for my life, that He is working in my life as I wait patiently for Him
– To Meditate or Practice Mindfulness: to quieten my busy mind and seek my inner strength within
– To Trust in God: for me, this is the most important one; to trust that God is always faithful to walk with me through my joys and sorrows, and that He is always with me through thick and thin

To tell you the truth: I don’t always do all these things above. When our bodies are starved, we can feel the hunger pangs. But when our souls are starved, we are sometimes not even aware of it. Let us always remind ourselves to nourish our souls lovingly.

Feel free to add to my list in the comments. I would love to find out more ways to nourish my soul. Thanks!

Small Actions that lead to Big Impact



I would like to share three stories that shows how small actions that led to big impact in my life recently.

Story 1: Last October 25th 2022, I went to my friend’s house to ask her to write the Foreword to my Blessed Journal book. Suddenly, our conversations turned unexpectedly when I found out she actually has not one, but four book ideas! I incredulously asked her: why are you not writing your own book? That’s when I cornered her to choose one of her book ideas and start on her writing journey. Last month, she launched her book – I’ll Never Walk Alone, by Dr. Frances Penafort – in New York, at the beginning of July, then in Malaysia, on 30th July, 2023. A simple meeting for one thing (writing my book’s Foreword) which led to a fabulous writing journey for my beloved friend. It was truly incredible!

Story 2: During the course of my dinner with a close friend, she had a 180 degree about turn for a tricky financial situation she was in. As she was telling me about the situation, I prayed for her silently. Suddenly, she decided to give generously to bless her friend in that situation. Both of us were so shocked, and we felt the power of the Holy Spirit working in this situation to bring about that change! That was the power of a silent heart-felt prayer for a friend.

Story 3: A mistaken wrong number on WhatsApp turned into a friendship that inspired me in many ways. To know that it’s not scammers and stalkers out there, but a kind soul who wanted to be a friend. Just a small gesture of kindness that is returned back many folds.

These, and many more incidences, led me to ask myself if I see my daily seemingly small actions have any impact at all. The answer is: YES. Small actions can and do lead to big impact. If we heed the nudges, take the action (however small), and allow ourselves to be vessels to bring about the impact in people’s lives.

Soar, not Strive

This morning, I listened to a devotional from YouVersion for the verse from Ephesians 3:20-21 (NIV):

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

What I loved most about the message was this: to SOAR under the wings of the Holy Spirit, instead of striving with our own effort and failing miserably. God truly wants to bless us immeasurably more than we can ask or imagine. The sad part is, we sometimes dare not even ask or imagine much in the first place, as our cynicism buries our dreams and hopes.

Whatever place you are in your life right now, seek God to lift you up and SOAR in the wide blue sky under the mighty wings of the Holy Spirit. Let God bless you more than you can ever ask or imagine.

Paused – to catch the word of the Year

Yes, I have PAUSED in my blog – again. I am not quitting, but putting it on “pause” for a few months. During these few months, the Word of the Year was revealed to me: CONSISTENCY. The irony is that – I have consistently been procrastinating, instead of taking action towards my goal of writing consistently. Perhaps, like the water in the kettle, it takes time for it to boil. I consoled myself as I pondered during this season of “pause”.
I believe the concept of Consistency is tied to forming a habit, e.g. forming the habit of writing consistently or the habit of exercising regularly. Doing things consistently is one of the keys to success. Part of that doing things consistently – is not quitting, and to show up, again and again, especially after we’re down and don’t feel like getting back up.
Last year, my Word of the Year was Integrity. It helped me focus on doing what I said I would do. The greatest thing I achieved last year was to publish my Blessed Journal on Nehemiah. This was one thing I had said I wanted to do for a few years, and it finally came to fruition when I published the journal in 52 days last November in 2022. All because I had focused on one word for that year – Integrity.
It is my fervent prayer – that I would achieve my Word of the Year – CONSISTENCY – in 2023, with the help of the Holy Spirit. That I would write to share my thoughts, insights and what I have learned – and to be faithful in what God had called me to do.

I would like to suggest that you decide on your Word of the Year too. Just one word to focus on for this year. Something that resonates with you, and to challenge you! If you are bold enough – share it out!!!

What do you do when you lose your momentum?

The 7 Habits to Keep Momentum Going

The new year for 2023 started exciting enough, but I kind of lost my momentum as January progressed and the festivities of Chinese/Lunar New Year started. That’s where the third part of Evan Carmichael’s book Momentum comes in – The 7 Habits to Keep Momentum Going.

  1. Morning Routine – setting a routine to start the day with energy and to do what matters most
  2. Chunk Your Time – batch similar tasks together, and setup a Weekly Routine
  3. Big Why / Little Why – a reminder for today for your Little Whys when you lose sight of the Big Why – in other words, what I do today towards my goal matters
  4. Tie Your Self-Worth to Your Effort, not the Results – just put in the effort of showing up, and be the person who shows up, the results will eventually come
  5. Pass the Pillow Test – ask the question: Am I proud of myself? If I didn’t follow through, ask the question: Am I proud of my reason why? However, be gentle to myself
  6. Join A Community – of like-minded and like-actioned people, get your supporters and be a supporter
  7. Focus on Who You Are Serving instead of who you aren’t – continue to reach out to those I am serving, and not be affected by those I am not serving

This post is about my showing up and keeping my momentum. Yes, it has been a challenge maintaining my momentum, but I am reminded not to give up.

As it is still in the season of Chinese/Lunar New Year, I will end this post with: HUAT AH!!!

Take Action to Start Your Momentum

Continuing on Evan Carmichael’s book on Momentum, taking action is the next step after shifting your mindset. He starts with the 2% difference – to start immediately even just a small difference. Then have a mini plan of 5% and start doing 95% – this will help you to start the momentum and find out what works and what to improve at the next cycle. Start small to learn what works and what doesn’t work so you can improve on it.

However, do expect things to be challenging as you start, especially when you don’t know how to start. The best way to avoid backing out is to tell and commit to someone. Also, elevate your environment by auditing your energy – reduce energy vampires and collect good people who support and inspire you.

One interesting thing he suggested to change your state is through music. He has a playlist for how he wants to feel. I used to put a playlist when I did photo processing. I also find energetic music motivates me to exercise better.

As I come to the last few hours of 2022, I would like to reflect on the year that is coming to an end. I have started on the momentum of my journey to become a journal author, and I need to remember my intention when I’m having my doubts and insecure.

As I welcome a new year for 2023, it is my sincere prayer that each of us will pursue our god-given dreams and take action to keep our momentum to always move forward. Never give up!